[FM] 02.08 - The War is Winning.
Feb. 23rd, 2008 10:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
How do you win a war?
He's been through so many, and the worst ones he's faced are ones over his own inadequacies. His own failures and faults, because it's a battle in his heart all the time. It's a struggle over what is right, and what is clearly wrong and when he makes that choice... it's never the easy one. It's never one of left or right, it's of who will live and who has to die. He knows deep down that is how wars are won. That to win the battle you have to take that hill, and you have to put the gun to the forehead of that one person in the way and pull that trigger without remorse. It has to be your choice through and through because when the gunfire sails your direction you can't have regret on the tip of your tongue.
The deeds he's done in the past are stacking up onto him as well. All the ones he's killed, their names are stitched onto his heart. All the eyes he's looked into a moment before they go dead are forever emblazoned onto his mind. They're with him. All the time. Never fading like the wounds that he gets that always heal, this is always different. It will always be different, because he'll never forget.
A hundred years and he'll always remember. That is how wars are won. You never forget, never surrender, never give in...
He hasn't forgotten, but he knows he's losing the war. He's lost so much. His men. His time. His memories hold a gap in them so wide he can feel the void in them. As near and dear to him as the chill of death as he crawls his way back into the light. This is how the battle is winning... because everytime he gets pulled into that black, into the cold of the darkness he knows he's just going to climb back out and he's going to have to face it all over again.
He'll never die. He'll never be allowed to give in.
This is how the war will win him in the end.
He's been through so many, and the worst ones he's faced are ones over his own inadequacies. His own failures and faults, because it's a battle in his heart all the time. It's a struggle over what is right, and what is clearly wrong and when he makes that choice... it's never the easy one. It's never one of left or right, it's of who will live and who has to die. He knows deep down that is how wars are won. That to win the battle you have to take that hill, and you have to put the gun to the forehead of that one person in the way and pull that trigger without remorse. It has to be your choice through and through because when the gunfire sails your direction you can't have regret on the tip of your tongue.
The deeds he's done in the past are stacking up onto him as well. All the ones he's killed, their names are stitched onto his heart. All the eyes he's looked into a moment before they go dead are forever emblazoned onto his mind. They're with him. All the time. Never fading like the wounds that he gets that always heal, this is always different. It will always be different, because he'll never forget.
A hundred years and he'll always remember. That is how wars are won. You never forget, never surrender, never give in...
He hasn't forgotten, but he knows he's losing the war. He's lost so much. His men. His time. His memories hold a gap in them so wide he can feel the void in them. As near and dear to him as the chill of death as he crawls his way back into the light. This is how the battle is winning... because everytime he gets pulled into that black, into the cold of the darkness he knows he's just going to climb back out and he's going to have to face it all over again.
He'll never die. He'll never be allowed to give in.
This is how the war will win him in the end.