[Cardiff] The solace and the silence.

[onlysayinghello]

Distracted was putting it mildly, and he knew that everyone at the Hub could see it too. Of course it wasn't as if he had much to divulge to them. There were the glances though, burning gazes at the back of his head that the moment he turned to face them snapped away as if caught doing something they knew they shouldn't be doing.

He thought for sure that Gwen would question him, all her needing to know just what made him tick, it had to be eating at her to see him so out of his element. Yet there he was seated at his desk in the Hub trying not to think about the fact that there was a four hundred year old man at his flat, that had been buried alive... and that Jack had grown a bit more than fond of him. Of course all the unanswered questions were inching up in his conscious as well. None of it made any of it any easier.

Still he'd just taken off. Flight to Japan and back again without so much as an explanation as to just what had gone on. It was routine for Jack, they should have been aware of it by now, that not every thing he did had an answer available to give, even to them. It was better for them, or at least that was what he convinced himself of. Glancing to the clock he was relieved that it had been a slow day, well relatively slow at least. Owen was off looking into something or another and the rest of the cases had been tied up for a few days now. Jack could have taken time off, he could have just rested up, stayed in bed and taken care of things for Adam.

Instead he felt torn... because he wasn't sure what to even think, and having Adam in his flat... around him all the time wasn't helping him keep a clear head on it all. So the time apart was something he needed, and he knew Adam needed it as well. A time to just be alone and not with anyone around him to ask questions that Jack knew wouldn't be easy to answer. Questions Jack knew he had more than a few of.

Standing up he grabbed his coat off the rack and said his good nights to Tosh, telling her not to stay too late. He stopped and picked up something for dinner and then headed up to his flat. Keys slid into the door and his toe pushed it open, hands still holding the food. A few steps into the room and his foot nudged the door shut behind him before the food was placed on the counter. The chill in the room surrounded him, even with his big coat, but he didn't actually mind. Temperatures didn't seem to phase him these days, and he could see the slight flush to Adam's cheeks proof that once more he had been standing in the cold. It was the moments like this, where Jack saw something he hated seeing in anyone, and it was that exact reason why Jack knew he was right going into work.

It pulled at him, tugging him in so many different directions he wasn't even sure which way was up, let alone right. All he saw was the despair and the half empty gaze from across the room. Jack let his eyes meet Adam's and in that silence Jack wished he already had all the answers, but he knew he was far from that moment... so far he couldn't even think what the horizon looked like.

"You didn't have to shut that," Jack's words cut across the cold of the room before he started to move toward Adam. "The window, I mean."

Comments

[onlysayinghello.livejournal.com]

The comment got a smile from Jack and a slight bit of laughter that almost sounded foreign in such a still atmosphere. It wasn't entirely unwelcome, just distant sounding to his own ears, "Now... if I was intending for that sort of activity I'd have just left us on the couch knowing we'd eventually raise our body temperatures on our own."

Trying to sober his expression though it was a bit difficult given the topic that he'd been repeating now that it had been mentioned he shook his head and ran a hand through his hair before meeting Adam's eyes again, "I have extra blankets, and I'm not looking for sex, well I am, but not right now. The way the day has been the last thing we need is that, I just don't want to wake up with a kink in my neck, and it really is cold in there," Jack stated.

Leaning in a bit to press a kiss atop knuckles even Jack felt the cold hit him at that moment, his back tensing for a moment before he pressed another quick kiss to Adam's hand before letting it go, "It has to be something with the heat," Jack said as he moved to the thermostat and fiddled with it before opening the linen closet near the bathroom to grab blankets.

"I'm all for staying in bed and keeping warm, but when did my flat turn into an ice box?" Shaking his head, and arms full of blankets he stopped in between where he was and where Adam was standing, to just look at him, still slightly cold still more lost than he was willing to admit, and Jack felt like he was right there in the middle of it with him.

Exhaling he smiled at Adam and moved toward the bedroom tossing the blankets onto the bed before turning around, "I'll deal with the dishes and food tomorrow when I get up for work."

[changehistory.livejournal.com]

"I wanted the fresh air," Adam said, with an apologetic glance at the thermostat. "I didn't think..." Now that he did, he didn't want the cold, either. It was too much like the cold of the grave, and the cold that lingered inside of him, too deep. "I'd forgotten how cold winter was."

Which was an inane sounding thing to say, given where he'd spent some of them, but also true in a way. More true was that he hadn't quite thought about it.

He frowned a little, then followed Jack to the bedroom. Leaning in the doorway, he paused, just watching him for a moment, before making sure his smile was real when it answered Jack's. "That sounds like a better plan than doing anything else tonight..."

Moving in, finally, he reached for a blanket and helped Jack smooth it out on the blankets on the bed. "I don't want to keep you up, if you need to sleep..." He needed to, too, but doubted he'd be able to without a lot more of the vodka.

[onlysayinghello.livejournal.com]

Jack shook his head in reply, "You don't have to apologize for the cold, it's nothing that a bit of warmth can't solve. I know how it is when all the open space around you still feels like the darkness is closing in," Jack's features sobered a bit in that moment, trying to push back his own qualms about how things had been for him lately.

Dropping the corner of the blanket he had he ran a hand through his hair before moving before Adam, letting a hand rest to his hip, "I actually have the liberty of being able to nap in my office, so even if I don't sleep now, I can sleep later." Jack let his forehead rest upon Adam's for a moment, a thumb straying against the back of his neck as soon as his hand rested at the right spot, "I'll stay awake with you."

[changehistory.livejournal.com]

Adam's smile flashed, sweet and grateful as he leaned in and kissed Jack, very lightly. "Thank you." The words are soft, but sincere and in them is far more than just gratitude for being willing to sit up through the dark of the night. He'd come for him. He hadn't left when Hiro came. He'd taken him home, given him somewhere safe, even with questions. He hadn't pressed too hard for answers, and he hadn't run from the ones he did get, no matter that Adam could tell he'd disturbed him.

He hadn't kicked him out yet, and he was staying up, and right now that seemed like the kindest thing anyone had ever done for him. So he kissed him again, just as soft and sweet before pulling back. "I don't suppose you have...sweats or something to sleep in? With the cold..." Though his cheeks heated a little, and he couldn't quite say why.

[onlysayinghello.livejournal.com]

Jack smirked at him, "I'm sure I have something for you." Brushing his lips across his for another kiss that was barely there Jack smiled against his mouth, "I've spent plenty of time buying clothing."

Parting from Adam, Jack moved across the room to his closet, tugging on the string that flipped the overhead bulb on. Glancing along the rows of shirts and pants his eyes settled on a box he'd almost donated a dozen times but hesitated each time. Pulling the box off the shelf he brought it into the bedroom setting it atop the dresser. The lid slid off and Jack pulled out a few pair of drawstring pants, and tanks that he knew might be too light for tonight, but he had a few longer shirts in a drawer, which he pulled out as well. The stack of clothing was minor, but it would do for now.

"If you find anything else you're welcome to it, trust me I have things I haven't worn in a few years still. All of it still up to date, but really I just have a habit of buying too much."

[changehistory.livejournal.com]

"Thanks," Adam said with a rueful smile. "I should probably hit the shops while you're at work. I didn't have much before, after...well. The Company didn't exactly let me shop. And the few things I did manage to acquire are all in Montreal, still." Except the suit he'd been wearing in Odessa, but he wasn't ever putting that thing on again.

He was sort of amused at how much there was, just for pulling out and stacking for him. "I can't say I've ever had quite as much as you have in there, though," he said with a slight grin, nodding at the closet.

He slid out of the shirt Jack had brought him before they ate, tugging on one of the long sleeved ones, then tugged off the jeans and pulled on pajama pants quickly, changing with as little fuss as possible, just wanting to crawl under all those blankets.